Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I wish i was in the wii world.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Randomize
