this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober