hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'll put lettuce on them
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.