Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize