I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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