I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
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