He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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