areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
