addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
i drank out of a bidet.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
