My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
