do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
