At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I just made out with a guy for $7.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
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