i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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