Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
