I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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