Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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