My entire life is one complicated drinking game
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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