around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
