"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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