This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
