Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
