wake up i wanna do it froggy style
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
