OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
