She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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