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• (206): View more from Washington

  Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad

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• (858): View more from California

  Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.

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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (334): View more from Alabama

  thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week

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• (310): View more from California

  Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.

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• (607): View more from New York

  I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.

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• (432): View more from Texas

  I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men

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