Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
