if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
