I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize