i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize