She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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