he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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