the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
My cat gives me a boner
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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