I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Randomize
