my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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