if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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