shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have so many feelings about this burrito
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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