I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize