I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
