Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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