Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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