but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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