Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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