Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
