so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
