Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
We are all done wearing pants today
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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