woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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