new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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