i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize