i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
you would pick up someone in the library
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Randomize
