My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
