One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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