So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
